« Kids say the darndest things | Main | Rest your weary head, the end is coming »
 |
 |
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone...by linz at 10:33 AM on March 11, 2004 |
It's spring, and with that season comes the usual bombardment of heartbreak and romance. Spring is when we get restless and itchy. If we're single, we start feeling the urge to wake from our winter slumber and find us some action. If we're in a rut, we realize it's time to get out. (If we're me, we are still in the throes of new love, and none of this applies.) I am amazed at the relationship deaths and births taking place around me right now.
It's spring, and there are 3 weddings I have to go to between now and July. To defray this cost, I have picked up 2 weekly gigs. One is an open mic I host, the other is a happy hour gig. Both are at sports bars which pay well though the atmosphere leaves something to be desired. I bet you are snickering, picturing my liberal, no-TV-watching, lemming-hating self at a sports bar. The Happy Hour spot is particularly funny because it's more of a family restaurant setting in the burbs, full of young families whose memories of their days of live music watching are fresh in mind, who have said things to me like, "Yeah, now that I've settled down out here, it's not so often that I see new artists. It's a nice surprise to walk in & find something like this here."
Their little kids stand right in front of my stage, mouths agape, swaying a bit, and they look even cuter when mommy hands them a five and shows them the pitcher at my feet to put it in. The lonely bachelor at the bar tosses in a 20 every week. The young waiters are unusually attractive and tell me their romance issues. I bestow the wisdom of 25 years of far too much thinking upon them. They give me the answers to trivia, which happens as soon as I'm done playing.
It's spring, and my band is finally playing at some good venues. My band is playing out and people are digging it. We have pretty labels for our CDs and we have songs that people sing along to. People tell me they got goosebumps. There is no higher compliment than this. I have gotten comfortable enough onstage that I can actually dance and not feel like a dork. We have practice on Wednesdays. Last night we turned the blues song into a reggae song, and the punk song went double time. We have a show on Saturday.
It's spring, and after almost 3 years, I am finally getting better at my job. Two big meetings in the last two weeks, which I helped organize, went really well. Instead of being at the information desk, I was in the meetings. Instead of being overwhelmed, I knew all the acronyms, understood most of the science, and had a few topics I actually felt passionate about hearing (like women's involvement in our programs overseas). I borrowed a few business suits from Cameron and tried to look the part. But as soon as I open my mouth I reveal my true colors. I can't help making cracks in our weekly staff meetings.
It's spring, and five months since my first date with Sean. We are going to a fancy coastal place in Mexico next Wednesday. Five days of scuba diving, horseback riding, four-wheeling... most of it for free due to a lovely contest his business won. I'm incredulous. I don't know that I really believed before that a relationship could keep getting better & better like this. I think I'm more of a cynic than I let on in this respect. I don't mean to gloat, I really am having trouble believing this. He is learning to talk to me. He's told me things he's never told anyone, things that are private and vulnerable and precious to me. I watched him soap up his face in the shower this morning, and knowing his eyes were closed, I just drank him up. I hugged him and said, "I love this." He said to me last week, "Ever since I knew where I wanted my life to go, I've been looking for someone like you."
Last Saturday we sat on his balcony all afternoon, me sitting up on the railing, playing any song he requested. He told me when I left that he had a wonderful day with me. I have these fleeting visions of reading a newspaper in a sunny kitchen, and him sitting down next to me and handing me one of the 2 cups of coffee he's carrying. If I look directly at forever, it still really hurts my eyes. But when I squint at it in my periphery, it looks kind of damn beautiful.
Happy, happy spring.
comments (43)
If that post could come with an audio clip, we'd be hearing birds chirping and the sun shining (can you hear the sun shine?) in the background. And something soft and sappy. Norah Jones, maybe.
I can't believe you didn't mention spring sex.
by Yen at March 11, 2004 11:38 AM
Yaaaaa! Linz is in love! It is one hell of a good feeling isn't it hunny? This is, by far, the best spring of my 33 years. I feel like I'm living a damned Hallmark card. It's pretty cool though. For my birthday present this year it's going to be steak and BJ day. How cool is my girl!?
Soooo Linz, when am I going to get one of those CDs so i can play it for all of my friends? Can i buy one on your site?
by Ezy at March 11, 2004 01:19 PM
Damn straight, spring rules. Especially this one. I am home, preparing to sell our hovel to some sucker for an ungodly sum! Yaaay!
Like the part about your band. Reminds me of that Billy Joel line: "They sit at the bar and put bread in my jar, and say man what are doing here."
by anna at March 11, 2004 01:39 PM
If anyone deserves to be sent a CD (and a free one at that), it'd be me. Send me a CD.
by mg at March 11, 2004 01:54 PM
Warm fuzzies abound with this post, but it's hard to feel really excited about spring when my bike ride to work this morning was greeted with 30 degree weather (the high of the day... it's supposed to get colder throughout the day) and 20 mph winds. And it snowed last night. Damn Wisconsin.
On a lighter note, some of your spring rules do apply to me-- I met and asked out not one but TWO girls! I have 2 dates this next week.. I haven't had a date in over 6 months.
by Leaffin at March 11, 2004 01:55 PM
Dating? What's that?
Does being spanked count?
by Yen at March 11, 2004 02:18 PM
Good job Leaffin. You're in Madison right? I had some very happy hunting when I was in Madison. The women there were definitely fun. The whole snow and sub-zero temperatures thing sucked the large one though. All the more reason to stay inside and play though, Yin and Yang if you will.
Yen, being spanked always counts.
by Ezy at March 11, 2004 03:03 PM
So far, spring sucks, (not in the good way, Ezy) and everyone can take their warm and fuzzies and stick 'em … I think I just had a quarter life crisis. I burned some bridges and almost quit my job all because I don't know what I want. At least I managed to get a cell phone and update my web site. Maybe I'll bitch about it in a post if anyone cares and if BS is still around this weekend.
by MrBlank at March 11, 2004 03:12 PM
God man, post it!
by Ezy at March 11, 2004 03:33 PM
See? I'm too happy to have a right to post right now. It's just annoying.
Leaf, nice job!!! Agreed Ezy, spanking always counts.
Anna, congrats! And yeah, it is SO like that. I can't wait to get out of these gigs & play an ampitheater or something!!!
Yen, sorry... SPRING SEX! SPRING SEX! SPRING SEX!!!!!!!!
Y'all, my cd is just the mp3s that are on the band website, so, temporarily, if you click my name you can access it. Mmmkay?
by Linz at March 11, 2004 03:37 PM
Or so I thought. Here.
by Linz at March 11, 2004 03:39 PM
Oh, wait. Nevermind. Spring IS good. Out of the blue, I just got asked out on a date.
by MrBlank at March 11, 2004 04:49 PM
Go you, Blank!
Ezy, yup, I'm in Madison. I can kinda handle the cold mostly because the summers are so wonderful here. And the lakes are real purdy when they freeze over. As long as you're looking at them from indoors.
by Leaffin at March 11, 2004 05:14 PM
Man I miss BW3. Those wings were the truth! I walked on water, albeit frozen water, for the first time in Madison. I think it was Lake Mendota. Man, I was scared shitless. People from the south generally don't make it a habit of walking on frozen lakes but that's because our frozen lakes are bona fide death traps. One step and you're through the ice. Not too fun.
Go Blank! Live it up my man.
by Ezy at March 11, 2004 05:27 PM
Another season hath passed, and so begins lockheed's idiotic cycle... Linz, what happened to the 'trader' boy you were dating... I've seem to have missed a few episodes about the young lady down south, who means well, is reasonably intelligent, but continues to bombard us with the same personality... spice it up, you heard MG, spice it up...
by LOCKHEED at March 11, 2004 05:41 PM
No, no, Blank, you're supposed to stick by "Spring Sucks".
Because it does. BIG time. Where does a girl find someone man enough to hurt her these days?
by Yen at March 11, 2004 08:39 PM
Sorry to break it to you Ezy, but I'm really not a fan of BW3's. Ever since I've been vegetarian, those buffalo wings aren't really all that appealling.
Another cool thing about winter here is Kites on Ice, where a bunch of like, pro-kite-fliers get together and do a huge show, including synchronized kite flying. Pretty cool.
by Leaffin at March 11, 2004 08:45 PM
Ah, those men (or, boys). They dish out that hurt and then the pain lingers. Sweet spring pain.
by jean at March 12, 2004 04:02 AM
I saw that while I was there Leaffin. My first thought was "Man, those cats must have some good drugs" but after watching for a while I decided it looked pretty damn fun. They do some amazing synchronized shit. That's too bad about BW3. Oh well, more for me ;-)
Yen, those boys are a dime a dozen. What you need to find is a man well versed in the art of sustained pain with peaks and valleys, a rollercoaster of pain if you will. That's the money shot.
Hi Jean!
by Ezy at March 12, 2004 12:30 PM
Hola Ezy! That is so rotten it's funny.
by jean at March 12, 2004 05:58 PM
Sometimes I disgust myself Jean.
by Ezy at March 13, 2004 03:56 AM
so pierre, has that mike replyed yet? it is gett'n' on me nerves that he isnae replying!
by Jock McTavish at August 16, 2004 07:18 PM
no, ah donnae think so, ah'll check some more if ye like but ah donnae think so, maybe the people in these other comments will know anything about him. ezy? do ye know any thing about mike little?
by Pierre montgomery McTavish at August 16, 2004 07:23 PM
Ezy or what ever ye blinkin' name is, do ye know anything about mike little? he is a rude, thick-in-the-head bastard and ah have been teaching him a lesson and now he has gone quiet on me after me saying something important, so do ye know anything?
by Jock McTavish at August 16, 2004 07:32 PM
Did I miss something?
by Linz at August 17, 2004 09:46 AM
Not really. I don't think I have ever met a Mike Little in my life. Is he in the Washington D.C. area? If not then why the fuck would I know him Jock or whatever ye blinkin name is?
by Ezy at August 17, 2004 09:53 AM
Sort of Twilight Zoneish huh Linz? I must have missed something too.
by Ezy at August 17, 2004 10:08 AM
One guy pretending to be 2 Irish guys is the vibe I'm getting...
by Linz at August 17, 2004 12:15 PM
Multiple personality disorder maybe?
by Ezy at August 17, 2004 01:47 PM
ezy, it's me, ah havenae been here for a bit because ah didnae think ye were goin' to reply. why the fuck should you know him ye ask? well because he has a site on the internet that is similar to this and i thought ye might no him via the web not in person you stupid idiot! god ye are stupid, i didnae ask if ye knew him n person i ment if ye knew his SITE you fucker! so don't get pissing shirty with me ya bitchy bastard. and what the heck is washington D C? and what kind of name is ezy?!
by Jock McTavish at August 31, 2004 12:49 PM
"Ezy or what ever ye blinkin' name is"
It seems that you were the first to get pissy here Jock. Do you have any idea how many websites like this exist? The odds of me knowing this guy would be nothing short of astronomical. Think about it moron.
"and what the heck is washington D C"
You're calling me a stupid idiot? This is too easy to respond to. I rest my case.
Ezy is the name I write under here. If you think it's my real name, see my comment directly above. So, in short, go fuck yourself Jock, if you can even figure out how to do that right.
by Ezy at August 31, 2004 01:22 PM
how dare ye get pissin' shirty back to me! i am a very verry important guest here and you have nae right to shit on me back! i am the son of a very important leader, i am much much more inteligent than you by the of you having no idia that who i am and spert'n' out your disrespectful language not knowing who i Jock McTavish is, and i am scottish in case ye havenae noticed because you seem to be to stupid to notice anything and ah have heard of washington D C but no one has ever told me aboot it so watch what ye say to me next time you stupid fucked up sterio fucker
by Jock McTavish at September 2, 2004 04:15 PM
Jock, I dare alright. You're an important guest here? I guess I didn't get the memo. Who here invited you exactly? My guess is no-one. I have no idea of who you are because to me you didn'tt exist until you called me out in this comment thread. You don't matter.
You are the SON of an important leader, if you are even serious, not the leader himself. That doesn't make you important Josh, it makes you the SON of someone important. Do something noteworthy yourself and you too might gain some importance. Until then riding your daddy's coattails doesn't get you any respect here. I won't give a rat's ass one way or the other though. You are of no consequence to me. Why would I give a damn what your nationality is? Again, it is one of least important things I can think of right now.
Learn to spell intelligent first Jock before you profess to be intelligent. You sound like a little jackass to me. As long as you choose to reply back to this Jock, I will say any fucking thing to you I like. Have a nice day and, again, go fuck yourself.
by Ezy at September 2, 2004 05:06 PM
My goodness.
Ezy, check this . Interesting. Jock came to Mike Little's site, looking for the name of the singer of "sunshiny day." Then he came here to this post, which has the same title as Mike Little's site, but says he's looking for Mike Little. He also visited a few other sites looking for the same song and berating strangers.
Jock wanted to find a song and instead found a bunch of weblogs.
Jock, Sunshiny Day is a nice happy song. We are nice, happy people. Why are you going around the internet, using different names with the same email address, and being mean to strangers, with or without this affected Scottish accent, trying to posture yourself as an general's son, with a handsome brother?
Here is the song:
======================
Artist: Johnny Nash
Song: I Can See Clearly Now
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I’ve been prayin?for
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
Look all around, there’s nothin?but blue skies
Look straight ahead, nothin?but blue skies
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone,
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
======================
Now quit being so rude. Okay?
by Linz at September 3, 2004 11:28 AM
Also, Jock, if you are wondering how I learned all this about you, try going to Google.com and doing a search for yourself.
by Linz at September 3, 2004 11:30 AM
It's pretty amusing actually. I'm going to keep on baiting. It's probably some 14 year old kid, on a break from masterbating, trying to get a rise out of people. The "general", that's good stuff.
by Ezy at September 3, 2004 04:04 PM
hello matee, i see ye ganed some intelligence on google.com eh? more like some untrue inteliblaaaaaarience! me, a 14 year old kid eh? no, i'm afrade not, ye are the 14 year old kid aroond here, i think what ye saw was other Jock McTavish's coz i searched for meself and saw my comments to people on some and these other guts on others, my comments are baiset only on a birds melody, mike's journelized and his linked family, schattn's guestbook, sharron de mol's blog, rico the boring weirdo as i call him, gary the boring talking weirdo, the completely foreign weirdo, chloe's thing/the stupid weirdo and something called olimpycs start today! other than that any others are diferent Jocks, and i do believe i was aboot to reply back to ezy's comment to me but ye interupted me and ye have also blabed to ezy aboot so untrue stuff, i am not pretending to be scottish or more than one people, i am scottish! donnae you believe this for a minute ezy if ye are out there look'n' at this comment, what they said isnae true all i said was true pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeazzzeeeeeeeee ye have to believe meeeeeee!!!!!!!!!?!!!!!! and oh that linz friend of yours sure is stupid, she thought ah was bein' irish, ah donnae beleive irish dudes speak like that actually boy you guys are daft, on where i keep the other blog weirdo sites i named you 'ezy the stupid swearing weirdo'!
by Jock McTavish at September 3, 2004 05:33 PM
ooops ah put the wrong things at the midle o' me comment, och, coz ah ment to say how do ye know ah use diferent names, what in these sites tell ye exactly what i do? it doesnae tell ye anywhere that i pretend be other people by puttin' other names in, coz for all you knoow it might be me friends for a start, so ask me first before takin' me all the wrong way and makin' up untrue stories aboot me
by Jock McTavish at September 4, 2004 06:38 PM
First of all, I'm sure Linz can run circles around you in any intellectual arena. Of that I have no doubt. Jock, I tire of you. You could do more constructive things with your time like maybe making some intelligent contribution to any topic written here. Maybe trying not to be such an overbearing ass might be a good start. "Ezy the stupid swearing wierdo" is pretty lame there Jock. Did it take you all night sweating and straining that little brain of yours to come up with that? How about "Jock the sheep banging sot"? I think I like that better.
by Ezy at September 6, 2004 11:30 AM
hey ezy you know that's a great idea except seen as though i'm classed as stupid here i dinnae knoow what a sheep banging sot is, any way, noow i am goin' to answer ye last reply ye put before that bloody linz friend of yours, if of course she is your friend and not just a person ye pretend to be interupted me reply'n'. first of all ye said "i'll say any fucking thing to you i like" well then i'll say any fucking thing i like to you so theyere.
"Learn to spell intelligent first Jock before you profess to be intelligent" oh! ah am more intelligent than you think! more intelligent than ye are for sure, i may not of knoown what washington D C is but i knoow more important things than that, and i am important meself without just being the son of an important leader if that is not good enough for ye, i am the leader of the folk of dukinfield 'the owner of dukinfield' and it is still not ye place to go aroond bein' shirty back to me, i repete! I AM THE LEADER'S SON AND OWNER OF DUKINFIELD WICH IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN WATEVER YOU ARE, you are probably just some fucked up bloody shoe sales person who doesnae make much money who needs to go on a diet who in term is to stupid and rude to be allowed on the internet with your crap-awful ugly fucker's page trash excuse for a site of "happy people" as ye call yourselves, hauh, if ye are such "happy friendly people" ye shouldnae swear at me just because i said "ezy or whatever ye blinkin' name is" ezy is a rude name for a seven year old girl with a closed dead mind like you to be called as a nick name anyway, it means a girl who goes with every man she sees, seen as though you are the stupid one aroond here i thought i'd better explain! how's that eh for such a stupid Jock McTavish, eh??? now go fuck yourself right back you stupid dumb thick dumb brain dead closed minded bitch
by Jock McTavish at September 6, 2004 08:02 PM
oh, and some more things i forgot to point out: "You are the SON of an important leader, if you are even serious, not the leader himself. That doesn't make you important Josh, it makes you the SON of someone important. Do something noteworthy yourself and you too might gain some importance" well! my frend is the GRANDAUGHTER of just a reverend and she has to be treated wi' respect because of it and that's just wi' being a grandaughter, not daughter! grand-daughter, and grandaughter of just a reverend, not leader! JUST a reverend so you and all those other people should say to her what you said to me: you are the GRANDAUGHTER of a reverend, if you are even serious, not the reverend himself. that doesnae make you important sheridan(that's her name) it makes you the GRANDAUGHTER of a christian church hoster. etc. "Learn to spell intelligent first Jock before you profess to be intelligent" all i did was miss out an L! big deal! my keyboard has a miss-out-pressed-key problem and it misses out letters sometimes so if i've missed out a letter it's coz the keyboard has missed out a letter, not my fault, i've got a fucked up keyboard! "Why would I give a damn what your nationality is? Again, it is one of least important things I can think of right now" aah! that's where ye are wrong! it is an important thing! wanna know why? well! are we not arguing(or should i say were arguing)? well our nationality is important if we are against each other, are ye not an american? well, you need to know coz this is like an american against a scotsman so think before ye start saying things aren't important you moron! and i think i know why ye think i'm one person pretending to be more than one when i post comment, you think this because the other names have the same email address, oh no no no no they are my friends, they don't have email addreses so they use mine, now are ye satisfied, and why have ye gone quiet on me all of a sudden, this is just the trouble i had wi' mike little! don't you be ignorent too, what happend to "I'm going to keep on baiting"????? huh? huh?????
by Jock McTavish at November 3, 2004 07:33 PM
by Jock McTavish at December 5, 2004 03:51 PM
http://thescottishboysblog.blogdrive.com/
by Jock McTavish at December 5, 2004 03:54 PM